Why you need a break from the kids and how to get one

Why you need a break from your kids and how to get itFor what seems like the 10th time today, I’m frustrated at one of my kids. I am ashamed to admit that I have yelled way too much this morning. After a week of sickness (me and various children), a night of interrupted sleep, and cold weather that has kept us inside, I am ready to snap. It’s not a nice place to be and I know I need to do something about it fast. I need a break from my kids.

Quiet Please sign

No, I’m not going to take off for the weekend. I don’t have the luxury of an on-call babysitter. But I do know how to get back on track to being a loving, patient mom instead of the frazzled person I was this morning.

Why might you need a break?

Even the most dedicated and patient mother needs a break every now and then. Your reasons may be different from mine. Do any of these sound familiar?

  • New baby
  • Health issues in the family (yours or someone else’s)
  • Super busy day
  • Homeschooling
  • Not enough sleep
  • Financial worries
Some of these things are happy (new baby!) and others are not, but what they all have in common is that they all cause stress. Any of these things or countless others will wear down even the most heroic of mothers over time. As mothers, we are so used to putting others’ needs first, that we can ignore our own needs. Simply put, we need to take care of ourselves. Taking a break and getting some downtime is an important part of that process. You can only forge ahead on full speed for a limited time before you crash and burn. Stop and take a break before you get to that point!

How I get a break in the midst of our busy day.

My kids are accustomed to having a quiet time in the middle of the day for 1-2 hours. The toddler naps, the older 2 spend time in their rooms finishing schoolwork, and the 6 year old listens to audiobooks, looks at picture books or plays with a quiet toy. Everyone stays in their own space until quiet time is up. This time is so vital for me and for all of us to recharge, rest and prepare for the activities of the afternoon. This peace and quiet is paramount for me if we’ve had the kind of morning like today. After a while, I am relaxed and ready to be patient and productive again.

Sometimes I can’t wait for afternoon quiet time to get in a break.

Sometimes a sick child has kept me up at night so that I am over-tired the next morning. Sometimes bad news pushes me to seek some quiet for a moment. Or maybe I am overwhelmed by the demands of our family and our current struggles. I admit it happens all too frequently.

When this happens, I take a short break. Any of these things can re-ground me and redeem my day:

  • A phone call to a friend (not too long or the kids start getting into trouble)
  • Put on upbeat music.
  • Sit the little ones down to read a picture book. Let the to-do list wait.
  • Spend a quick 10 minutes outside with the kids. Fresh air and sunshine work wonders for my mood!
  • Clean something up. Our home is no stranger to messes but when it gets out of control, I get stressed out. Clearing off a countertop or washing the dishes really helps my mood.
  • If all else fails, I take a couple deep breaths while counting to 10.

The bonus is that most of these things help my kids’ attitudes too. We are all happier afterward.

When possible, I try to schedule in breaks in advance.

Just one hour once a week with a friend, with or without kids, can change my entire week. Some other possibilities for scheduled breaks:

I feel so much better now after our afternoon quiet time.  I know my kids will, too. My kids need me to be a great mom. A break helps me to do just that.

Have you taken a break today? What do you do when you need a break?

Photos by Elliot Brown.

2 thoughts on “Why you need a break from the kids and how to get one

  1. My 11 month old typically takes two naps a day and I spend that time in meditation. It’s something I just started about a month go and it really helps calm me down and relax me. I let the windows up to get some fresh air, sit in a quiet space, close my eyes, and just breathe. Total stress reliever!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

CommentLuv badge